I have been without a car for 4 days in an almost empty apartment and slowly the white walls are closing in...
Somehow hearing the neighbors is oddly comforting, I know I am not alone. I understand that life is going to be different and that it will take some time to adjust. It has ONLY been 4 days and I can't expect to have it all figured out. I need to rack my brain for every creative ounce and find things to fill the empty spaces.
God has been really good. He has given me so many quiet still moments to breathe deeply and recognize all that I have to be grateful for. The verse "Be still and know that I am God" has often convicted me in the past. While I will probably continue to struggle with the quiet emptiness I know that it is an immense opportunity for me to focus on what really matters. To focus on my relationship with the Lord and push deeper seeking him with all my heart.
It also gives me time to focus on this little guy...
As he quietly sits basking in the sun coming in the screen door I am amazed once again at the gift I have been given. I know that I don't deserve all that God has blessed me with, but I am so very grateful. Aiden has been precious these last few days, maybe I didn't take the time to slow down and savor the sweetness in this child, or maybe he is just growing up and learning to love in a new way. I will take all of the random kisses, hugs, and smiles. I will savor that little hand reaching behind my neck to grab me tight. I will treasure these moments for I know they are fleeting and should not be taken for granted.
In the stillness, in the empty spaces, with white white walls...I am reminded.
He is just so precious, Faith. :) Praying for you on this journey!
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